By the end of this chapter you'll be able to…

  • 1Summarise the poem: a father contrasts past genuine relationships with present artificial ones
  • 2Explain the poem's structure: nostalgic 'once upon a time' opening vs. sad present reality
  • 3Analyse the significant reversal: father asks son to teach him to smile 'with heart' again
  • 4Identify poetic devices: contrast, repetition, tone shift, metaphor
  • 5Discuss the theme: loss of authenticity, nostalgia, social hypocrisy
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Why this chapter matters
Once Upon a Time by Gabriel Okara is a nostalgic, emotionally resonant poem that contrasts authentic human connection in the past with hollow, artificial behaviour in the present. The poem's ending — a father asking his son to teach him to be genuine again — is a powerful reversal that students find both surprising and moving. AP SSC poetry questions regularly test stanza analysis, tone, and theme. The poem's theme (authenticity vs. performance in social relationships) connects strongly to essay topics on human values and social change.

Before you start — revise these

A 5-minute refresher here will save you 30 minutes of confusion below.

Once Upon a Time — Gabriel Okara

"They used to shake hands with their hearts. Now they shake hands without hearts."

The Poet

Gabriel Okara (1921–2019) was a Nigerian poet and novelist. This poem reflects his concern about the LOSS of GENUINE human connection in a modern, materialistic world.

The Contrast — THEN vs. NOW

THEN (Childhood/Past)NOW (Adulthood/Present)
People laughed with their HEARTSPeople laugh with their TEETH only
Shook hands with WARMTHShake hands without feeling
Faces showed GENUINE emotionFaces are MASKS ('wearing many faces')
Eyes CONNECTEDEyes are 'ice-block-cold'

The Poet's Confession

'I have learned to wear many faces — / homeface, officeface, streetface, hostface, cocktailface...' The poet admits: he TOO has become fake. He TOO has learned to PRETEND. And he HATES it.

The Plea to His Son

'Show me, son, how to laugh. Show me how I used to laugh and smile / Once upon a time when I was like you.' The poet asks his CHILD to TEACH him to be GENUINE again. 'Children are AUTHENTIC. They have not yet learned to wear masks. The poet wants to UNLEARN what adulthood taught him.'

Themes

  • Loss of Innocence and Authenticity: Growing up means learning to PRETEND.
  • The Superficiality of Modern Life: People perform emotions rather than FEEL them.
  • The Child as Teacher: The hope that CHILDREN can show adults how to be REAL again.

Poetic Devices

  • Simile: 'laugh with their teeth like a snake's bare fangs'
  • Metaphor: 'ice-block-cold eyes'
  • Repetition: 'faces' — emphasises the multiplicity of masks

Full Summary

'Once Upon a Time' is a POEM about the LOSS OF AUTHENTICITY in human relationships. The poet, Gabriel Okara, expresses a NOSTALGIC longing for the PAST — when people were GENUINE, warm, and sincere. In the modern world, he observes, people have become FAKE — wearing MASKS, laughing without feeling, and shaking hands without MEANING.

Stanza 1 — The Contrast: 'Once upon a time, son, they used to laugh with their HEARTS / and laugh with their eyes. / But now they only laugh with their TEETH / while their ice-block-cold eyes search behind my shadow.'

The poet tells his son that in the PAST, people laughed GENUINELY — with their whole being. Now, laughter is SUPERFICIAL — only the TEETH show, but the EYES remain 'ice-block-cold.' The eyes are INSINCERE — they 'search behind my shadow' (looking for something to gain, not connecting with the person).

Stanza 2 — The Handshake: 'There was a time indeed they used to shake hands with their HEARTS / but that's GONE, son. / Now they shake hands without HEARTS / while their LEFT hands search my empty pockets.'

In the past, handshakes were EXPRESSIONS OF GENUINE WARMTH. Now, they are EMPTY GESTURES. The 'left hands search my empty pockets' is a POWERFUL IMAGE — suggesting GREED and SELF-INTEREST. Even while greeting you, people are checking what they can GET from you.

Stanza 3 — The Masks: 'So I have learned to wear MANY FACES / like dresses — / HOMEFACE, OFFICEFACE, STREETFACE, HOSTFACE, COCKTAILFACE / with all their conforming smiles / like a fixed portrait smile.'

The poet CONFESSES that he TOO has learned to pretend. He wears DIFFERENT 'FACES' for different situations — home, office, street, party. All of them are FAKE — manufactured smiles that do not come from the heart. The word 'PORTRAIT' suggests something STIFF and ARTIFICIAL — like a painted smile that never changes.

Stanza 4 — The Request: 'And I have learned, too, to laugh with only my TEETH / and shake hands without my HEART. / I have also learned to say 'Goodbye' / when I mean 'Good-riddance'; / to say 'Glad to meet you' / without being GLAD; and to say 'Let's do this again' / when I DON'T WANT TO.'

The poet lists the SOCIAL HYPOCRISIES he has mastered: saying goodbye when he means good riddance, saying 'glad to meet you' when he is not glad, saying 'let's do this again' when he never wants to see the person again. 'This is MODERN LIFE — a constant performance of emotions we do not FEEL.'

Stanza 5 — The Plea to His Son: 'Show me, son, how to LAUGH. / Show me how I used to laugh and smile / ONCE UPON A TIME when I was like you.'

The poet turns to his CHILD — asking him to TEACH him how to LAUGH genuinely again. 'Children have not yet learned to pretend. Their laughter is REAL. Their joy is AUTHENTIC. The poet wants to UNLEARN everything adulthood has taught him — and rediscover the INNOCENCE of childhood.'

Stanza-by-Stanza Analysis

StanzaSummaryKey ImageryTheme
1Contrast between past and present laughter'laugh with their hearts' vs 'ice-block-cold eyes'Loss of genuine emotion
2Contrast between past and present handshakes'shake hands with their hearts' vs 'left hands search my empty pockets'Greed and insincerity
3The poet admits he wears masks'homeface, officeface, streetface'Loss of authentic identity
4The social hypocrisies he has learned'Goodbye' when I mean 'Good-riddance'Deception in social interaction
5Plea to his son to teach him authenticity'Show me, son, how to laugh'The child as teacher. Hope for redemption

Themes — Detailed

1. Loss of Innocence and Authenticity

'The central theme of the poem is the LOSS OF AUTHENTICITY that comes with growing up. Children are GENUINE — they express what they feel. Adults are FAKE — they say what is EXPECTED, not what they mean. Growing up means LEARNING to PRETEND. The poet MOURNS this loss.'

2. The Superficiality of Modern Life

Modern life, according to the poet, has turned human relationships into TRANSACTIONS. People do not connect with each other — they USE each other. The 'left hands search my empty pockets' is a devastating image of how even handshakes (symbols of friendship) have become OPPORTUNITIES for exploitation.

3. The Performance of Emotions

'The poet lists the MANY FACES he has learned to wear — implying that modern life is a constant PERFORMANCE. We act DIFFERENTLY in different settings — but NONE of these performances is the TRUE SELF. The 'portrait smile' is FIXED and ARTIFICIAL.'

4. The Child as Teacher

In a beautiful REVERSAL of the usual parent-child relationship, the poet asks his SON to teach HIM. This suggests that: (a) Children have WISDOM that adults have lost. (b) Authenticity is not something we LEARN — it is something we UNLEARN. (c) There is HOPE — if we can reconnect with our inner child.

Poetic Devices — Detailed

DeviceExample from PoemEffect
Simile'laugh with their teeth like a snake's bare fangs'Compares modern laughter to a SNAKE — suggesting DANGER and DECEPTION behind the smile.
Metaphor'ice-block-cold eyes'Eyes are compared to blocks of ICE — suggesting COLDNESS, LACK OF WARMTH, and EMOTIONAL DISTANCE.
Repetition'homeface, officeface, streetface, hostface, cocktailface'The repeated 'face' EMPHASISES how many masks the poet wears. The more faces, the MORE ARTIFICIAL life becomes.
Repetition'Show me, son, how to laugh. Show me how I used to laugh'The REPETITION of 'show me' creates a PLEADING TONE — the poet is DESPERATE for his son's help.
Contrast'laugh with their hearts' vs 'laugh with their teeth'The central structural device of the poem. PAST = genuine. NOW = fake. The contrast DRIVES the poem's meaning.
Imagery'left hands search my empty pockets'VISUAL IMAGE of greed and opportunism — even a greeting is a chance to TAK E from you.
Personification'conforming smiles like a fixed portrait smile'The smile becomes a THING — separate from the person. It 'conforms' — it does not express genuine feeling.

Important Quotes

QuoteMeaning
'They used to laugh with their hearts... Now they only laugh with their teeth.'Past laughter was GENUINE. Present laughter is SUPERFICIAL — only the mouth moves, not the soul.
'Their left hands search my empty pockets.'People are OPPORTUNISTIC — even while greeting you, they are checking what they can GET.
'I have learned to wear many faces, like dresses.'Authenticity is LOST in modern life. We are ACTORS playing different roles.
'Show me, son, how to laugh.'Children are AUTHENTIC. Adults must LEARN from them. There is HOPE for redemption.

Vocabulary

WordMeaningSentence
ConformingFollowing accepted standards'His conforming smile was fake.'
FangsSharp teeth of a snake or animal'Their smile was like a snake's fangs.'
RidiculeTo mock'Good-riddance' implies a desire to be rid of someone.
AuthenticGenuine, real'The poet longs for authentic relationships.'
HypocrisyPretending to have virtues one does not have'The poem criticises social hypocrisy.'
NostalgiaLonging for the past'The poet feels nostalgia for childhood innocence.'
SuperficialExisting only on the surface'Modern laughter is superficial.'
PortrayTo depict or describe'The poet portrays modern life as fake.'

Exam-Focused Questions (Extended)

Q1. What contrast does the poet draw between the past and the present? The poet contrasts GENUINE human connection in the past with SUPERFICIAL interactions today. 'Then': people laughed with their HEARTS and EYES, shook hands with WARMTH. 'Now': they laugh only with their TEETH (like a snake's fangs), shake hands without HEARTS, and their eyes are 'ice-block-cold.' The past was AUTHENTIC; the present is FAKE.

Q2. What does the poet mean by 'wearing many faces'? The poet means that in modern life, we PRETEND to be different people in different situations. We have a 'homeface' (for family), an 'officeface' (for work), a 'cocktailface' (for parties). None of these is our TRUE SELF. We have LOST our authentic identity behind a collection of MASKS.

Q3. Why does the poet ask his son to teach him to laugh? Because CHILDREN are still AUTHENTIC — they have not yet learned to pretend. The poet has forgotten how to laugh GENUINELY — his laughter is now a PERFORMANCE. He wants his son to REMIND him what real laughter FEELS like. The poet believes that the child can be a TEACHER to the adult.

Q4. Explain the significance of the title 'Once Upon a Time.' The title is IRONIC. 'Once upon a time' is how FAIRY TALES begin — suggesting something MAGICAL or FICTIONAL. By using this phrase, the poet suggests that GENUINE HUMAN CONNECTION is now almost a FANTASY — something that existed only in the distant past. It also creates a NOSTALGIC tone — a longing for a time that may never return.

Self-Test Questions

  1. What is the MAIN THEME of the poem 'Once Upon a Time'?
  2. Contrast the 'then' and 'now' described in the first two stanzas.
  3. What does 'wearing many faces' mean? Why does the poet do it?
  4. Why does the poet ask his SON to teach him to laugh?
  5. What is the significance of the IMAGE 'their left hands search my empty pockets'?
  6. Explain the SIMILE: 'laugh with their teeth like a snake's bare fangs.'
  7. What is the tone of the poem?
  8. What REQUEST does the poet make at the end of the poem?
  9. How does the poet use CONTRAST as a structural device in the poem?
  10. What HOPE does the poem offer?

Answers to Selected Questions: Q2: THEN: people laughed with their hearts and eyes; shook hands with warmth. NOW: people laugh only with their teeth (like snakes); shake hands without hearts; eyes are 'ice-block-cold.' Q10: The poem offers hope through the CHILD. The poet asks his son to teach him to laugh again — suggesting that AUTHENTICITY can be RECOVERED, that the innocence of childhood can be a MODEL for adult behaviour. The final stanza is a PLEA for REDEMPTION.

Key formulas & results

Everything you need to memorise, in one card. Screenshot this for revision.

Poem Analysis — Once Upon a Time
POET: Gabriel Okara (1921–2019). Nigerian poet and novelist. Wrote in English. Known for blending traditional African themes with modern poetry. STRUCTURE: The poem is addressed by a FATHER to his SON. It begins 'Once upon a time, son...' — like a fairy tale opening, signalling nostalgia. THEN vs. NOW: PAST: People smiled with their HEARTS. They shook hands with their HEARTS. Welcome was genuine. Felt and meant. NOW: People smile with teeth only — it does not reach their eyes. 'Ice-block cold eyes' that search for your weakness. Handshakes are like mechanical things. Welcome is hollow. THE REVERSAL (most important): At the end, the father — who has LEARNT to be fake and artificial in the modern world — asks his young son to teach him how to LAUGH GENUINELY again. The innocence and authenticity of the child becomes the teacher of the adult. THEME: (1) Nostalgia for genuine human connection. (2) Critique of modern social artificiality. (3) The child as a symbol of lost innocence and authenticity. (4) Colonial/post-colonial influence on African social behaviour.
AP SSC KEY QUESTIONS: (1) What is the poem 'Once Upon a Time' about? (2) How does the father describe 'then' and 'now'? (3) What does the poet mean by 'they used to laugh with their hearts, and laugh with their eyes'? (4) Why does the father ask his son to teach him to laugh again? (5) What is the central idea of the poem? (6) What poetic device is used when the poet says 'shake hands without their hearts'?
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Common mistakes & fixes

These are the exact errors that cost students marks in board exams. Read them once, save yourself the trouble.

WATCH OUT
Missing the significance of the poem's ending
The MOST IMPORTANT element of 'Once Upon a Time' is the FINAL STANZA where the father asks his SON to teach HIM to laugh genuinely. This is a REVERSAL — normally fathers teach children. Here, the child (who is still innocent and genuine) becomes the teacher of the adult (who has been corrupted by social artificiality). This reversal contains the poem's central insight: AUTHENTICITY is not maturity — it is innocence. Adults lose it as they learn to 'fit in.' The child, who hasn't yet learned to be fake, retains the purity the father has lost. This ending should be the climax of any answer about the poem's theme.

Practice problems

Work through this chapter's problems as a readiness check — reveal each solution, mark yourself honestly, and get your gap report at the end.

Readiness check

Are you exam-ready for Once Upon a Time — Gabriel Okara?

1 problems from this chapter. Try each one, reveal the worked solution, mark yourself honestly — get your gap report at the end.

1 questions~2 min

5-minute revision

The whole chapter, distilled. Read this the night before the exam.

  • POET: Gabriel Okara (1921–2019). Nigerian poet and novelist. Wrote in English. Considered one of the finest African poets of the 20th century. Known for 'The Voice' (novel) and for poetry that blends traditional African oral traditions with English literary forms.
  • POEM STRUCTURE: The poem is addressed by a FATHER to his SON. It begins 'Once upon a time, son...' — the fairy-tale opening signals nostalgia and a story about the past. The father contrasts THEN (past = genuine) with NOW (present = artificial).
  • THEN vs NOW CONTRAST: THEN: People laughed with their hearts ('with heart and eyes'). Handshakes were genuine ('with their hearts'). Welcome was felt and meant. Feelings were expressed authentically. NOW: People smile 'with their teeth' only — the smile doesn't reach their eyes. Eyes are 'ice-block cold' and search for weakness. Handshakes are hollow. Welcome is a performance.
  • THE REVERSAL — MOST IMPORTANT: In the FINAL STANZA, the father — who has LEARNED to be fake and artificial in the modern world — asks his young SON to teach him how to LAUGH genuinely again. The child, who has not yet been corrupted by social artificiality, retains the authenticity the adult has lost.
  • THEME: (1) Nostalgia for genuine human connection that existed 'once upon a time.' (2) Critique of modern social artificiality — adults learn to perform, to 'wear faces' to match the occasion. (3) The child as a symbol of lost innocence and authenticity. (4) Post-colonial context — some critics read the poem as about African people adopting Western social masks and losing their genuine African identity.
  • POETIC DEVICES: (1) CONTRAST — the central structure of the poem (then vs now). (2) REPETITION — 'Once upon a time' repeated, 'laugh' repeated, emphasising loss. (3) METAPHOR — 'ice-block cold eyes' (eyes like ice blocks — cold, hard, calculating). 'Faces for different occasions' (masks). (4) TONE SHIFT — from nostalgic/wistful (then) to sad (now) to hopeful/humble (ending). (5) IMAGERY — physical details: teeth, eyes, hands, hearts — all body parts that should express genuine feeling but no longer do.
  • SIGNIFICANCE OF 'ONCE UPON A TIME': This fairy-tale phrase frames the past as something distant, perhaps legendary — something that existed so long ago it feels like a story. It suggests: the genuine social world of the past is now as remote as a fairy tale. It also gives the poem a melancholy, storytelling quality — the father telling his son about a world the son has never known.
  • THE CHILD AS TEACHER: The ending reversal is revolutionary — the adult LEARNS from the child, not the other way. This reflects a Romantic literary tradition (Wordsworth, Blake) where childhood is associated with innocence and spiritual truth that adults lose. But Okara adds a modern, post-colonial dimension: it is not just innocence that is lost, but AUTHENTICITY itself.
  • COLONIAL READING: Some literary critics read the poem in post-colonial terms — the 'artificial' behaviours (hollow smiles, faces for different occasions) represent the Western social masks that colonial education imposed on African people. The 'then' represents a pre-colonial African culture of genuine community. The father is mourning what colonialism took, not just what modernity took.
  • AP SSC EXAM NOTE: The most-asked question is about the poem's ENDING — why does the father ask his son to teach him? This reversal must be explained in depth: (a) the adult has been corrupted by social performance, (b) the child retains authentic expression, (c) this shows childhood innocence as superior to adult 'sophistication,' (d) it is a humble admission from the father.

Andhra Pradesh (BIEAP) marks blueprint

Where the marks come from in this chapter — so you can plan your prep.

Where this shows up in the real world

This chapter isn't just an exam topic — it lives in the world around you.

Social media and performed identity

Okara's poem, written in 1963 about post-colonial Nigeria, reads as a remarkable prediction of social media culture. Every Instagram post, LinkedIn profile, and WhatsApp status is a 'face for a different occasion' — a curated, performed version of ourselves. Research on social media 'authenticity' shows that people consistently report feeling more genuine in face-to-face interactions than in online ones, yet spend more time on social media. The poem's critique of hollow 'smiles with teeth' translates directly to the emoji-and-filter world of digital social life.

Mental health and authentic self-expression

Psychological research consistently finds that people who can express their genuine feelings — rather than performing social expectations — have better mental health outcomes. The phenomenon the poem describes — wearing different masks, suppressing genuine responses to meet social expectations — is called 'emotional labour' in psychology. Workplace studies show that extensive emotional labour (performing emotions you don't feel) leads to burnout. Okara's poem from 1963 articulates a psychological problem that researchers have only recently named and studied systematically.

The Romantic tradition and childhood innocence

Okara's poem joins a long literary tradition of celebrating childhood innocence over adult corruption — from William Blake's 'Songs of Innocence and Experience' (1789) to Wordsworth's 'Ode: Intimations of Immortality' (1807) to J.D. Salinger's 'The Catcher in the Rye' (1951). In all these works, children possess a truth and authenticity that adults systematically lose through socialisation. Understanding 'Once Upon a Time' in this tradition opens up the whole field of Romantic and post-Romantic literature.

Exam strategy

Battle-tested tips from teachers and toppers for this chapter.

  1. Central idea (2 marks): one sentence on what the poem is about (a father contrasts past genuine social relationships with present hollow ones) + one sentence on the deeper meaning (modern society teaches us to perform rather than feel genuinely). Two sentences = 2 marks.
  2. The ending (4 marks): explain the reversal (parent asks child to teach him) in four steps: (1) what the father has learned/lost, (2) what the child still has (authentic expression), (3) why this reversal is surprising but meaningful (children as teachers), (4) what this says about society (authenticity is associated with innocence, lost in adulthood). Four steps = 4 marks.
  3. Poetic devices (2 marks): choose CONTRAST (then vs now) and METAPHOR (ice-block cold eyes). For each: name it, quote it, explain the effect. Two devices fully explained = 2 marks. Do NOT just list devices without explaining them.
  4. THEN vs NOW comparison (4 marks): make a table or structured list: THEN — laughed with heart/eyes, handshakes felt genuine, welcome was real, felt welcomed INTO the heart. NOW — smile with teeth only, ice-cold eyes, handshakes are hollow, welcome is performance. Equal detail on both sides = 4 marks.
  5. Essay: Loss of Genuine Values in Modern Society — use this poem as evidence. Gabriel Okara's poem Once Upon a Time shows how modern social life replaces genuine feeling with hollow performance. As the father says, people now smile with only their teeth while their eyes remain ice-block cold — searching for advantage, not connection.

Going beyond the textbook

For olympiad aspirants and curious learners — topics that build on this chapter.

  • Research Gabriel Okara's novel 'The Voice' (1964) — written partly in a deliberate non-standard English that attempts to translate the rhythm and grammar of the Ijaw language of Nigeria into English. Okara argued that African writers should not simply use standard English but should adapt it to carry African sensibilities. This is a crucial debate in postcolonial literature: the choice between writing in the coloniser's language 'as is' versus transforming it. Research Chinua Achebe's different view on this question.
  • Investigate the broader theme of post-colonial identity in African literature — specifically the tension between traditional African culture and Westernised modern culture that colonialism imposed. Wole Soyinka (Nobel Prize 1986), Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, Ngugi wa Thiong'o (who rejected English and writes in Gikuyu) all address this tension. How does 'Once Upon a Time' fit into this larger literary conversation about cultural authenticity?
  • Explore the philosophy of authenticity — Sartre, Heidegger, and Beauvoir all wrote about the human struggle between AUTHENTIC existence (being true to one's genuine values and choices) and BAD FAITH (performing what others expect, denying genuine selfhood). Sartre's waiter in Being and Nothingness is a famous example — the waiter performs 'being a waiter' so completely he has lost his genuine self. Research how existentialist philosophy connects to the poem's themes.
  • Research the Duchenne smile and the science of genuine versus performed emotion — Paul Ekman's research showed that genuine happiness involves muscles around the eyes (orbicularis oculi) that cannot be voluntarily controlled, while a fake smile only uses the zygomatic major (the mouth corners). People can reliably identify fake smiles at rates above chance. Okara's poetic description ('laugh with their eyes' vs 'smile with their teeth') turns out to be scientifically accurate — the poem describes exactly what the science confirms.

Where else this chapter is tested

CBSE board isn't the only one — other exams test this chapter too.

AP Board SSC (Class 10)High — poetry analysis for 'Once Upon a Time' typically yields 4–6 marks in AP SSC English; the ending reversal is the most-tested element
CBSE Class 10 EnglishLow — CBSE uses a different poetry syllabus; this poem is AP Board-specific
College-level English essay writingHigh — post-colonial literature, authenticity, and social critique are standard themes in undergraduate English courses
UPSC Mains (Essay paper)Medium — themes of social authenticity, loss of values, and nostalgia are relevant to UPSC essay topics on Indian society and culture

Questions students ask

The real ones — pulled from the Q&A community and tutor sessions.

Laughing 'with your heart' means laughing GENUINELY — when the joy you feel on the inside shows on your face, in your eyes, in your whole expression. It is a laugh that is unperformed, unselfconscious, completely authentic. The eyes 'laugh with' the mouth. Compare this to the 'now' in the poem: people smile 'with their teeth' — just the mouth moves, but the eyes are cold ('ice-block cold') and calculating. This is the difference between a genuine smile (which involves the muscles around the eyes — the Duchenne smile) and a social performance smile (just the lower face). The poem gives a poetic name to this universal human experience of recognising when someone's smile is fake.

ICE-BLOCK COLD EYES is a powerful image (metaphor) that compresses several meanings: (1) COLD — emotionally cold, no warmth or genuine feeling. (2) HARD — ice is solid, unyielding; the eyes are not soft or inviting. (3) CLEAR/CALCULATING — ice is transparent; these eyes are watching you, assessing you, looking for your weakness. They are not distracted by genuine warmth. (4) FREEZING — like touching a block of ice, this kind of gaze is uncomfortable, creates distance. The image contrasts perfectly with the warmth of genuine eye contact — when people laugh genuinely, their eyes 'warm.' Ice-block cold eyes give no warmth at all. The compound phrase 'ice-block' (using two nouns to modify 'eyes') is particularly Okara's own construction — non-standard English that suggests African Pidgin English rhythms.

This is the poem's most social observation — the idea that modern adults wear different 'faces' (masks, performances) for different social situations. At work: a professional, serious face. With the boss: a respectful, slightly deferential face. At parties: a cheerful, sociable face. With strangers: a guarded, neutral face. The poet's point: NONE of these faces is real. They are all performances chosen to fit what the situation requires or what we think others want to see. The ancient self — the genuine, unperformed person — is buried behind all these masks. Okara presents this as a LOSS: once, people had one authentic face for all occasions. Now, social life requires constant performance. The father has learnt to perform; he has LOST his authentic face. He wants it back.

The poem is BITTERSWEET — melancholy but not despairing. The main body of the poem is elegiac (mourning something lost) — the father is sad about the loss of genuine connection. This is the pessimistic dimension. But the ENDING lifts the tone: the father WANTS to return to authenticity. He has not given up. He recognises that his son STILL HAS what he has lost — the child's laughter is genuine, his expressions are real, he hasn't learned to perform yet. By asking the son to teach him, the father is reaching toward hope: the possibility of UNLEARNING the social masks. The poem suggests that authenticity, while often lost in adulthood, is not permanently gone — it can be recovered, taught back by those who still possess it.

The poem's core concern is the VALUE of authentic human connection versus performative social behaviour. Okara argues that modern society — with its 'social niceties,' office politics, and networked interactions — teaches us to value FORM over CONTENT, performance over sincerity. We lose the ability to be genuinely happy, genuinely welcoming, genuinely kind — because we have replaced these qualities with their imitations. The poem's question — implicitly asked throughout — is: what is the point of social relationships if they are hollow? What are we losing when we lose authenticity? For AP SSC English, this connects to the unit's theme of values and human achievement: genuine human values (authenticity, warmth, trust) are more important than social performance.
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